Holiday Confusion

Hi. I know there is nobody out there. I'm just talking to myself, but I guess that's ok. I've been away..but not really. I've been unmotivated, is more like it. I guess everybody goes through that. You start a blog, you post every day, you are a font of creativity. You feel good about it. You start to wind down, you post every few days, then every few weeks, then you quit. You feel bad about it. Your font has dried up. But today I felt the motivation to say a few words, so even if nobody reads it, I can let go of my guilt for ignoring the blog.

So, about the title "Holiday Confusion", it is my own affliction. I am here, present, in mid-October. I went to the store this week, spent lots of cash on Halloween candy, and last weekend, we hit the local farms up in Green Bluff to pick our own pumpkins. I have my living room and family room decorated in a very "AUTUMN" theme. Pumpkins, mini-scarecrows, spicy smelling candles are burning...from the outside, I look like I'm all-in, as far as AUTUMN goes.

But alas, it is a sham. And the saddest part about it is, I LOVE the fall season! I have been in very warm states for the past 10 years, and have not seen the leaves change, nor felt the brisk wind of the dropping temperatures, nor have I even had a decent pumpkin patch to choose my Halloween pumpkin from. Unless you count that tented space in the parking lot on PCH in Torrance, with some pitiful goats in a pen and perfect pumpkins in long, organized rows. I don't count that. Fall has always been my favorite season, and I've missed it terribly. But this year, our first year back in a cold climate, and I'm not invested in it. I'm ready to skip over it. I want it to be CHRISTMAS!!

Sigh. Yes, I said Christmas. And believe it or not, I've been ready for Christmas since August.

It is a special season this year because 1. It is our first in our very own home, not military housing, and 2. My parents are coming for a short visit, and will be seeing the new house, and the new state, for the first time. I'm very excited.

I have all sorts of decorating ideas. I'm planning to do two trees, a family tree (large and live), and a vintage tree (small and artificial). I've been scouting thrift stores and EBay for months, looking for great deals on vintage ornaments. Back in July, I bought two matching Christmas wreaths at a garage sale. I have been anxiously awaiting the Christmas catalogs and magazines, for ideas. I've actually had to reign myself in recently, because my holiday enthusiasm was causing me frustration, and I don't want to be frustrated. The thrift stores are chock-a-block full of Halloween decor. I know, just as soon as Halloween is over, the Christmas merchandise will hit the shelves, but I get annoyed when I want to find some blue mercury glass balls for my vintage tree, and instead, there are mountains of plastic pumpkins and skulls and fake corn cobs.

I am annoyed at myself, for not appreciating my favorite season of the year. But then again, I want to press fast forward through October and November, and just get to December already!

That is not to say I'm not having my moments. I love the rainbow of trees in the area. Washington state is just beautiful. Our trip to Green Bluff last weekend was so great, with the apple orchards, hayrides, pumpkin patch, and mini-horse farm. Not to mention the smell of pumpkin donuts cooking, and a big slice of apple pie a la mode, with hot apple cider! Fabulous!

BUT....I admit it, right now, at this very moment, I'm listening to Christmas music on Pandora. I can't help it. My mind is otherwise occupied. I'm budgeting for presents. I'm planning menus. Thanksgiving? Hurry up and get yourself over and done with! Yes, yes, yes, bring on the turkey and stuffing, but I'll be waiting for the first week in December, when we can head back out to Green Bluff and cut our own tree down this year! Whoo hoo!! Merry Autumn!

*Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/eklektick/